So much has been happening that I haven't blogged about. It seems I just don't know where to start. Remember Kim's 50th birthday? Well a few days after her party, she found out she had lung cancer. It has been such a rough few weeks for her and her friends & family. She had surgery this morning, they removed the cancer and a few extra parts. Please, send up a prayer for Kim and her recovery. It is very hopefull and we are gratefull for that.
Ok, now Joan, I have a very very bestest friend who has been through hell with her back and has reached the end of the line for hope. She had surgery Tuesday to see if a pain pump would help. The surgery was aborted due to scar tissue which hampered insertion. She needs a miracle. Please send up a prayer for Joan and her family.
And then there is Elinor, she is my cousin. She just had two hip replacements on Monday. She is doing well and a prayer is in order for her also.
It comes in threes they say. How can we help our friends get through the rough spots? It all boils down to the simple fact that we are powerless to do anything really. We don't have any magic or secret potions. No one does. I try to think about how I would feel in their place and what I would want from my friends. I think that mostly I would want them to 'get it', no sympathy, no pity, no diversions, or syrupy cards. I would want them to really understand how I felt and what I was going through. And just be there and listen to me, really listen. I wouldn't expect them to have any answers or profound wisdom, just genuine support and caring.
It is really difficult to put yourself in their place, I don't want to be in their place, but being a friend means trying on their pain and suffering in order to be there for them. There is no way we can truly feel their suffering, but we can get a sense of it from our past experiences. If we are at a loss, then being quiet and being there is ok too.
Ok, now Joan, I have a very very bestest friend who has been through hell with her back and has reached the end of the line for hope. She had surgery Tuesday to see if a pain pump would help. The surgery was aborted due to scar tissue which hampered insertion. She needs a miracle. Please send up a prayer for Joan and her family.
And then there is Elinor, she is my cousin. She just had two hip replacements on Monday. She is doing well and a prayer is in order for her also.
It comes in threes they say. How can we help our friends get through the rough spots? It all boils down to the simple fact that we are powerless to do anything really. We don't have any magic or secret potions. No one does. I try to think about how I would feel in their place and what I would want from my friends. I think that mostly I would want them to 'get it', no sympathy, no pity, no diversions, or syrupy cards. I would want them to really understand how I felt and what I was going through. And just be there and listen to me, really listen. I wouldn't expect them to have any answers or profound wisdom, just genuine support and caring.
It is really difficult to put yourself in their place, I don't want to be in their place, but being a friend means trying on their pain and suffering in order to be there for them. There is no way we can truly feel their suffering, but we can get a sense of it from our past experiences. If we are at a loss, then being quiet and being there is ok too.
2 comments:
Oh wow, this really sucks. I will certainly say a prayers all around. Please go visit my blog pal Junie Moon (see my side bar for her link) she is doing a really cool prayer project this week and is probably one of the most spiritual people I know of.... it will help make you feel like you are doing "something".
Your friends are lucky they have you Deb, you always seem to know the right thing to do and say, so don't worry about that for a second.
xoxo
love ya
Oh, thank you, I did, she has a great blog site
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